*****Note this is from yesterday and I just finished composing it this afternoon. Imagine this to be yesterday.******
I'm changing the baby. I hear the oldest yelling frantically for me and I know that my husband is in the front yard watering the grass. I panic and pick up the baby who has NO diaper on. What are the chances (right....) ? I go find out what the oldest is yelling about and realize that the baby just pee'd all over everything; me, his cushion on the diaper changing table, himself, everywhere, and not just a little (of course not). SOOOO I hear my husband say never mind, it's not important, and I quickly go back to the matter at hand (now knowing the child downstairs isn't like bleeding to death or something)--cleaning up. Think quick, think quick...he's already cranky, it's bedtime, he wants his bottle, he's whining, doesn't feel good (still sick) so I'm all in Super Mario mode, racing all about. I put him in his crib, standing up, butt naked, no clothes on, thinking, what are the chances (right...)? I turn my back to do the clean up on the diaper changing station and hear the grunts. I swing around on my heels saying, "NOOOO!" and sure enough, poop everywhere. And because he's sick, it's not just a turd of poop. Nope. Uh uh. It's like water. Like thinned out mud. Everywhere. I start to laugh. I think, this is insane. I immediately pick him up holding him as far away from me as humanely possible and put him where? Back on the diaper changing station. Why? What in the heck was I thinking? More poop. Everywhere..
I start yelling for help. At the top of my lungs. No help comes. I am alone. I have to solve the problem on my own (oh the horror!). I take him to the ceramic tub (vs the vinyl less slippery tub) and again, what was I thinking? He slips and slides all over the place as he poops more. Mind you, this was not normal poops. This was sick baby poops. He was yelling, unhappy, and slipping all over the place. I was yelling, unhappy and my back was killing me. Finally the oldest comes running "mom what is it?" he sees the trail of poop and sees my face and goes to get his daddy (smart boy!).
My husband comes up and says, "What are you DOING? What's going on?" He takes a sweep of the immediate area, goes to check out the baby's room and he's not happy. What was I thinking?
It was like a hilarious, sad, sick, horror show. This is what I want to know. Why do these things happen to me? In talking with my mom, she pointed out that one bad thing turns into another because you're still dwelling on the last bad thing therefore not thinking clearly and next thing you know you have a string of bad things.
My day prior to that was just as bad. I won't even bore you with the details but it had to do with a shooting death, a seat belt getting stuck in a motorized door and having to spend the next 2.5 hours in the car dealership getting it fixed, and several other things at work, including worrying about my sick little boy. This is my life. I should just accept it ---- no?
Jenn
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