The line in the middle of the sand....

So last Friday we all three (after the littlest went down for the night) sat up and watched this movie that just came out on DVD called Zathura. It's basically a modern take on Jumanji. It's a movie about a live game played out by two siblings. I mostly enjoyed it for the most part but I'm telling you, what an eye opener.

It's amazing to me that the oldest is still so truly innocent. To him, a "bad" word (otherwise known as a 'cuss' word to us big people) is something like dumb or stupid. If you asked him what a cuss word was, I don't think he'd know. I'm afraid to ask him because I don't want to focus on it or have to talk about it with him because he's so sharp, he'd pick up right away that it was something I didn't want to expand on, he'd call me on the carpet about it. He'd want to know more. I can't take the inquisitive streak out of him, no matter how hard I try. Of course, even though he has quite the 'stinkeresque' streak in him, I don't want to take the inquisitive streak out of him. It's what makes him the oldest. It's what makes him so wonderfully sweet and lovable. To my point, I've seen it, I have been in the room with him when a true bad word (D or B or S or H (harry potter ron weasley says bloody hell harry) and he doesn't flinch. He never skips a beat. He doesn't (*yet*) say "ooohhhh MOOOOOOOMMMM, did you HEAR that?" none of that. He doesn't repeat them, he doesn't know they've been said, it's like literally in one ear and out the other....

In this movie, Zathura, they were quite liberal with the questionable words. There we were sitting nicely, as a family watching this family movie and BAM! I almost fell off the couch. Here is what the kid in the movie said and I'll set the scene up for you....
It's a part where a robot is introduced to the boys. The younger brother says, "That's a small robot" and the older brother says, "You're just jealous because I HAVE a robot" "Robots do whatever you tell them to do, watch this, go get me a juicebox BIOTCH!" Laughter.

I suck in my breath and look at Ivan who is inwardly laughing his a** off and I'm thinking, are you KIDDING me? Then at some point the younger brother called the older brother a dickhead. I'm all OMG. Dying. I'm thinking at this point, he's so vested in the movie, there will be a stink if I turn it off (yes PPS) so best bet is to play it cool and pretend these words are NOT being said. Do not react, do not make a scene. Eventually these bad words will go away...heh.

Is this me being overprotective? This is me saying, "This is what's wrong with this world!" Our kids have no choice but to be influenced in this way. I mean, yes, we can cut them off from the world at large and never allow them to see movies (even the animations these days are tainted and sprinkled with innuendos and adult overtones) or never allow them to interact with other children whose parents and influences we cannot control. Sure. Then we end up raising freaks who are not normalized to the soceity as we know it OR who have no idea what the real world is truly about.

What to do? Stay near the line. This is what I think. Watch them like hawks, know where they are. Know what they watch. Don't let them chat online. Don't put phones in their rooms. Don't put a computer in their room. Love them like nothing else at every turn in the bend and enforce rules that you believe in with your spouse/significant other. Don't go over the line, stay near the line. The line is drawn in the middle of the sand. If you go too far over it, the kid wil be over the top. If you never get too close to the line, the kid will always be a rule breaker, a rebellion, someone who has difficulty following the norm. You go too far, you're done. You don't go far enough, you're done. You have to stay near the line. Let the little stuff go and attack the big stuff with all you've got.

This movie, was a reminder to me. It reminded me to keep my eye on the line in the sand. It also reminded me to cherish the innocence that the oldest still has. I dont' know how he does but I love that he does. Maybe it has something to do with the TV shows he is not allowed to watch and the ones I encourage him to watch. Maybe it has more to do with the time we spend together, the awesome conversations we have, the reading we do together....whatever it is, it's working. Thank God for that.

J
A Mom, A Wife, and a Writer. That is me.